Indulgence, and Other Naughty Words
As spring drew to a close, I felt the desire to choose a magical word for the next season. Being a writer, words hold particular power for me. I often meditate on a particular word or phrase that I want to better understand or absorb. With summer being about energy, vitality, and production, I wondered if my word should be ‘joy’ as a reminder not to get so caught up in work that I forget to have fun. But that didn’t feel quite right. So I thought on it for almost a week before one morning, as I meditated, realizing there had been a word in the back of my head for a while:
Indulgence
“Willing to allow excessive leniency, generosity, or consideration.”
We do not indulge ourselves enough. In general, of course. Too often we deprive ourselves of good food because we “have to” be healthy, or of taking time for ourselves because other people “deserve” our time more. I certainly have been guilty of this to various degrees throughout my life, though it’s only recently that I’ve been able to recognize the self-deprivation. If you think you are just the opposite and indulge yourself too often, ask yourself this: could you actually be binging in between periods of deprivation?
Armed with my word, I have intentionally created magical space to take a bath, play my video game for an entire evening, go to the movies, and make myself delicious breakfasts. It’s hard every time to convince myself that I need indulgence. My recent mantra has been: only I can indulge myself. I learned through one of the most difficult periods of my life to be self-reliant. As much as I appreciated my friends and family’s support and encouragement, I was the only one who could pick myself up off the floor. Now that I’m in a better place, I’m still the only one who can care for and about myself in the special way that I can.
You know yourself better than anyone else.
There are several other magical words I’d like to marinate on in the future: selfish, blunt, reckless, stubborn, idle. There are so many words people tell us are bad, but are they? As a social species, there is a certain benefit to cultivating easy-going traits and behaviors, but we are not part of mindless herds. We are part of communities, many of which we get to choose to be a part of. We are in an age where we can and should re-examine naughty words like indulgence and selfish. How can they be reframed to mean taking care of yourself?
Over the past several weeks I have felt the healing power of my word working its magic. I feel more rejuvenated in the morning and productive during the day. My mental health has also improved as I continue to set boundaries between work and rest. Magic is most often found in mindset shifts. When we look at things upside down, the world suddenly looks different enough to question it.
